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Tuesday, August 26, 2014

10 Day Count Down! and Panic Attacks

How is it possible that we are down to 10 days left in Korea? The time is flying by and we still have so much to do! Speaking of flying...I'd like to mention how scared of planes I am. Scared doesn't accurately portray how I feel about flying these are a bit better- terrified, panic stricken, petrified, and just plane (there's that word again, I cant get away from planes!) old scared to death. Yes, I used thesaurus.com to find different words for scared. I'm a geek. Just thinking about boarding a plane and being on it for 15 hours (10 of which are over the ocean!) makes my heart start racing and want to jump out of my chest. Seriously, I just had to stop typing to collect myself. How the heck am I going to remain calm when I will have my 4 year old and 13 month old sitting next to me? Anyone have any suggestions for me? I'm all ears!

Time to change the subject before I have a nervous break down before we even board the plane. Ugh. When I said change of subject I mean not talking about flying. I'm still going to talk about the move. Relocating to another country is not easy. We are basically starting from the ground up. Finding a place to live, buying a new car, new furniture, and making new friends. It's hard. Plain and simple. Making friends has always been difficult for me. I may seem outgoing but I am really not. I would much rather stay at home and use my free time to read my books. I have plenty of friends in my books. Jamie, Claire, Master Raymond (if you have read the Outlander series you will know who I am talking about) their drama is so much better than real life drama. I hate drama and confrontations. I probably come across as a total witch with a capital b when I try to make friends. I'm really not though. I promise! It's just that my tongue gets all tied, my brain shuts down and I start sweating in places you didn't even know you could sweat! I'm not being rude, it's scary putting yourself out there! The couple of friends that I have here my husband made for me. How pathetic am I, needing my husband to make me friends.  Is it sad that I have already asked him to make me more friends when we get to our destination? No judging!

Geez, I need to stop typing before I give myself a panic attack. All this plane talking and friend making is giving me heart palpitations! This wasn't my idea for this post but there you go. It's all out in the open. No secrets here. I'm the geek who uses a thesaurus to look up words to describe her fear of flying, who needs her husband to make her friends. Take me as I am! All right, I'm out. If you need me I'll be spending some time at Lallybroch with the Fraser gang. In case you didn't know that's another Outlander reference.